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Building Resiliency

Building resiliency gets us back to joy.

Building resiliency begins with getting back to JOY from every BIG emotion. It involves sharing distress with others while remaining relationally connected. It also necessitates the often gnarly work of repairing ruptures in our relationships.

Front Brain vs. Back Brain

Enduring hardships and suffering well are experienced in the front of our brains, while trauma is experienced in the back of our brains. Our prefrontal cortex (the area right behind our foreheads) is where we are able to operate from desire. The back part of the brain located below the cortex packs the “fear punch.”

Trauma essentially means that our capacity (emotional, physical, spiritual) has been overwhelmed

We can build our resiliency, which, in turn, helps us grow our capacity so we are not as likely to become (or stay) traumatized.

Resolution to trauma is possible when it is integrated in such a way that moves the traumatic experience to the front of the brain where we can shift to a place of suffering well (acting like our true selves in spite of our pain).

When we can do this, we are less likely to become hijacked and immobilized by traumatic events that we’ve not been able to make sense of or to resolve. Brain activity shifts from back to front after trauma resolution.

It is possible to grow our capacity to do the following:

  • Remain faithful under pressure
  • Help others to be all they were created to be
  • Be willing to endure pain in order to be close to those we love
  • Tell the truth, even when it hurts

Increasing these types of activities in the front of the brain means we are running on love and desire.

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